October is pregnancy and infant loss awareness month and we at Risen Motherhood want to recognize all of you who have lost a child too soon. Below you'll find a selection of articles, posts, music and podcasts that we pray encourages a mom in the midst of grief. Just click on the links at the bottom of each quote to go to the original source.
"The most important thing I want to convey to a woman who has miscarried is that her pain has merit. What I mean by this is that I want her to know that what has happened to her truly is as terrible as it feels. I don’t want her to feel burdened to 'get over' her loss quickly simply because it is hard for those around her to understand. She has lost a child — death has robbed her of one of the sweetest gifts we can experience in this life! — and that is worth mourning. The pain she is experiencing is justified, and I want her to know that I am willing to walk through those dark valleys with her."
"When you’re having to walk through a couple of seasons of pregnancy with people and still don’t have a baby – I had to remind myself that God is good. That He’s not withholding anything good from me; He is only giving me good things. Those are really hard things to come to terms with when the good things you want are a baby. Those are hard things to come in terms with for people like us who are pro-life, we’re like, 'But babies are good. We love babies and we value life,' and yet God is saying no to that thing."
"Perhaps one of the sweetest mercies, for those who trust in Jesus, is his promise to never leave or forsake (Hebrews 13:5). He gives himself, his ever abiding presence, and I have found that it is typically in times of loss that I cherish him most. He sees the heartache that no one else can see, and is able to heal, comfort, strengthen, and give again in his own perfect timing and way."
"Our hope comes from our confidence in God’s sovereignty, his character, and his promises. When we read 'all things work together for good,' that good isn’t necessarily the growth of our family; we read it and are comforted that God works all things for his own glory, which is inexplicably tied to our good."
"Though You slay me
Yet I will praise You
Though You take from me
I will bless Your name
Though You ruin me
Still I will worship
Sing a song to the one who's all I need"
"Rarely do we see the final outcome of our losses. We don't often get to see the ultimate point of them all, but it doesn't mean it is not there. Hannah never got to see the Christ who was promised. She probably never saw the king who would carry the lineage of our perfect King Jesus. But she trusted the promise nonetheless. She knew her story wasn't the final word."
“There are a couple different paths you can go down. You can keep being feeling justified with how angry you are .... and I want you to think about a few years down the road, where does that path leave you? Or you can open your heart, saying, ‘God I want you to do a work of forgiveness in me, because I don’t want to be an angry, bitter woman forever.’”
“It is okay for death to be a big deal. If death was not a big deal then the fall is not a big deal, then Jesus coming back is not a big deal. … it is okay for death to be bad and for a miscarriage to take you to the depths of your soul.”
"'Some people ask, ‘Does it still really, really hurt?’ Yes, it does, but at the same time I see our daughter now, and I think, ‘She couldn’t be here if it weren’t for the sequencing and timing of the other events.’ ...It doesn’t diminish our other children. They are real and deserve to be celebrated just as much as our daughter who’s in the crib upstairs. But that helped me realize God has a plan. He works it out in an intricate, sometimes confusing and even painful ways, but it really does work out ... Down the road, you’ll find a great ministry through your suffering. Whether that be that your child was adopted or you ended up with a whole plethora of biological children. God writes cool stories and allows you use it for His glory.”
"In the middle of the darkness
The light of the world has come
You will make all things new
You will finish what you’ve started
By the power of your mighty love
You will make all things new
Jesus, you will make all things new"
"I remember the feelings and the sorrow. I remember the confusion and the brokenness. Some things are as vivid as if they had happened yesterday, and others are a little more lost to me. I guess that is what happens when the heart heals and life moves forward. It’s not so much that you forget the significance or the preciousness of the life you lost. It's that the Lord heals. He covers our wounds with His love, mercy, and grace. That’s the freedom that Christ offers through the cross. Redemption. Hope. Peace. Joy."
"When Jesus says, 'My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death,' we are comforted in knowing that Jesus understands the intensity of our sorrow. When we hear him say, 'My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine,' we realize that Jesus is showing us what to do when God doesn’t give us what we desperately want. When we hear him answer the questions about why a man was born blind saying, 'This happened so the power of God could be seen in him,' we begin to believe that God might actually have a good purpose in our pain."
“For those who love God—whether that love is great, small, or just clinging on—God works all things together for good. As we grasp this, we realize that the Lord won’t waste a moment of the pain and suffering that often feels pointless and random to us.”